Ingredients:
- 2- 5.1oz packages instant ‘nilla pudding (they were “Four For a $1” at Piggly Wiggly today)
- 6 – cups of 2% milk
- 6- ripe-ass bananas
- 8- single-decker, chocolate covered MoonPies, diced up the size of a ¼-20 machine bolts
- 6- cups heavy whippin’ cream (over by the fancy coffee light’ners and “soy milks”)
- ¼- cup of confectioner sugar
- -Couple dollops of good vanilla extract
- Bowls - lots of bowls. At least two for mixing, and one clear, fancy bowl for taking to the feast.
-Empty puddin’ packets into a big ass bowl. Add six cups of wicked-cold 2% moo-juice. Blend together with Momma’s blender on medium for a good spell ‘til mixed. Drop a couple drops of that extract in there.
-Pull some plastic wrap -or Granny’s shower cap- over the bowl and slide it into the Fridgidaire for at least three hours. DO NOT use the icebox on the porch - that’s for beer!
After three hours-
-Slice up the six bananas using a sharp fishin’ knife, about as thin as a dime.
-Pour that whippin’ cream into the butter churn and drop Daddy’s trolling motor into it…mix that mess on high, adding the ¼ cup of fine sugar and a couple glugs of that extract as you go. Keep’er going until you see “stiff peaks” – like the ones your cousin Willamina gets when she’s loading dry ice at the packing plant.
-In another bowl, take about three cups of the puddin’ and fold in two cups of that thick, sweet whipped cream. Don’t go banging around too hard! Pretend you’re stirring Momma’s Sunday collards.
-Spoon all that love into a large fancy, go-to-church-meeting bowl, and top with a single (that’s “one”) layer of sliced bananas and one diced-up MoonPie.
-Scoop in another layer of pudding on top of that and add another layer of bananas and MoonPie.
-Repeat ‘til you got no more stuff in the puddin’ bowl and the churn.
-Sprinkle the top with the MoonPie crumbs that wedged in between the chopping block and the stovetop.
-Top that fancy bowl with some plastic wrap, and slide that whole mess back in the icebox for a good four hours.
Remember, the skin on top is GOOD eatin’! And the longer she sits, the riper she gets!
From the kitchen of
Jamie & Kat Moncrief
(Leland Holler)
Cackalacky® Spicy Wings!
Ingredients:
Cackalacky Spice Sauce
2 - 2 1/2 pounds chicken wings
Directions:
Grill wings over medium-high heat until blackened and the juices are clear. Transfer wings to large bowl and tumble with one 5 Oz bottle of Original Cackalacky Spice Sauce. Serve immediately - while steaming hot!
From the kitchen of
Cackalacky Jack from www.CACKALACKY.com
The Chicken-Shit Fizz
1 oz Gin in a Highball Glass
2 oz Kentucky Fried Chicken Gravy
5 oz Club Soda
No Ice
You'll love it!!
Ciao, JK
From the kitchen of
Apollo Guitars
TequilaCoyote's Fried Green Olives
1 large jar of green olives - without the pits in them y'all
2 cups flour
3 eggs - whipped while listening to "Camel Walk"
2 cups of bread crumbs
1/4 cup parmesan cheese
1 bottle of Frank's hot sauce
2 cups of oil
Recommended music fer this operation is SCOTS Live at El Sol. If yer not playing SCOTS the dag-bern recipe won't work.
Mix the bread crumbs and parmesan cheese together in a bowl.
Drain the olives then dredge 'em in the flour - fancy high falootin' way of sayin' roll 'em around in the flour 'til they are coated. Don't let the olives get too dry after you drain 'em or the flour won't stick.
Dip the flour coated olives in the whipped egg one at a time.
Roll the egg coated olives in the bread crumb / parmesan cheese mix one at a time. It's gonna take a chisel to clean the goop off yer fingers after, but don't get yer knickers in a knot.
Put 2 inches of oil into a large heavy fry pan. Get the oil as hot as Mary (impossible I know), throw olives in and fry until brown. Scoop 'em out and throw 'em into a bowl lined with paper towel. Serve with hot sauce and beverage of your choice, call your doctor and schedule that by-pass surgery ya gonna need when ya finish 'em.
From the kitchen of
Gord Lockwood
Billy's Monster Buck Burritos
1 pound Deer steak
1 pound ground Deer
1 can black beans
1 can pinto beans
1 yella Onion
Fresh cilantro
Ground Cumin
Chili Powder
Chipotle pepper Powder
1 beer
1 Pound Monterey Cheese
Burrito Sized Tortillas
Cube Deer Steak.
Add cubed steak and ground deer to hot skillet and begin to brown.
Add diced onion to meat and continue to sizzle. Don't over cook, deer is better medium cooked.
When deer is about half cooked add drained and rinsed black and pinto beans. Mix them up well.
Turn heat to low and add aprox, 1/2 cup chopped cilantro, 2 TB Chili Powder, 1/2 TB Chipotle powder(optional for heat and smokey taste). Add 1 tsp cumin powder.
Mix it all up and open the beer. Add a splash of beer to the burrito mix, Mix it all together. Finish the beer, hopefully you opened a tallboy for the recipe.
Load mix into tortilla and add monterey cheese to yer likin'.
Eat until yer fuller than a tick.
Hope you enjoy this, Love the band.
From the kitchen of
Bill Jackson
White trash fruit salad
2 cans of fruit cocktail
1 apple, diced
1 orange, diced
1 banana, diced
1 bar of cream cheese- at room temp.
1 cup of mayonnaise
Drain fruit cocktail;reserving juice. Stir cream cheese to soften, add cocktail juice and mayo.
Stir in fruit.
Chill to set.
Enjoy!
The NASCARita.
One part Tequila
Two parts Mountain Dew
put it in a big ol' cup, f*ck the salt.
If ya want a frozen one, hit the 7-11 and get plain slurpee ice first, then mix equal parts slurpee, Dew & tequila.
Also known as the White Trash Margarita.
Peter Harzewski
Ossining NY
Trailer Park Sunrise
One part Tequila or Vodka
Two Parts Sunny Delight
Splash of Robitussin cough syrup, NyQuil cough or DayQuil
Serve in a tall tumbler, or simply add the vodka/tequila and cough syrup to the Sunny D jug.
Peter Harzewski
Ossining NY
sweet venison maple sausage - Italian style
1 pound venison sausage (preferably something sweet)
1 small onion (diced)
2-4 cloves of garlic minced (pends on your taste)
salt
pepper
1 box giant pasta seashells
1 small tub ricotta cheese
1egg (beaten)
1 bag grated mozzarella
1 jar or can of your favorite spaghetti sauce
Preheat oven to 350
Put noodles in a pot of lightly salted boiling water. Let it come back up to a boil. Cook noodles until slightly firm but not mushy. Drain. Rinse with cold water and set aside.
Now put a touch of oil in the bottom of a skillet. Crumble your sausage into skillet. Add onion and garlic with a dash of salt. Cook until sausage is brown. Drain. Put sausage aside to cool.
In a big bowl combine the tub of ricotta, 1beaten egg, and a few dashes of salt and pepper. Mix until combined thoroughly then add the sausage. One everything is mixed we can get to stuffing.
Stuffing is so easy my dead grandma can do it. Just take a small eating spoon and put 1-2 spoonfuls in each shell. First though you want to get you a baking dish and put some spaghetti sauce down. Then as you finish stuffing each shell just place it in the baking dish. When all shells are in pour rest of spaghetti sauce over top. Then take your bag of Mozzarella and sprinkle (or smother) everything.
Now ya put it all in the oven for about 15-20 mins.
When it's done let set a minute then dig in.
I like serving this with my cheap ass garlic bread. (cheap bakery loaf of Italian or French, spread with butter or margerine, topped with garlic powder, broil 1-2 minutes in oven)
Enjoy y'all.
From the kitchen of
Tea Wolfwind
Cornbread Dressing
4 cups cornbread crumbs
3 cups bread crumb
1 cup chopped celery
1 large Vidalia onion
(chopped)
¼ lb. fried chicken livers (chopped)
2 14½ oz cans chicken broth
2 cups milk
2 eggs, slightly beaten
1 stick butter (melted)
1 tablespoon sage
2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. pepper
Mix crumbs, celery, onion & liver.
Combine broth, milk, butter, egg, sage, salt & pepper. Add to crumb mixture. Stir until crumbs are moistened. Heat oven to 350°. Grease 2 - 9½ x 13¾ pans. Spread batter evenly in pans - Bake for 1 hour.
Notes: Save heels from loaves of bread & keep frozen 'till needed. Leave the bread out & let it dry, then
crumble into coarse crumbs. I always buy the fried chicken livers already cooked from a local Clock restaurant. A triple order provides extra to keep the cook happy while working.
Old family recipe from Greenville, SC
Peanut Butter and Bacon Sandwich
Fry up 4 or 5 slices of bacon for every sandwhich you would like to make, crispy or not, whatever you like, make some toast, spread with peanut butter add bacon and serve with a glass of milk. Serving warm is better.
From the kitchen of
Craig the Martian
Pizza Soup
Ingredients:
1 pack oriental curly noodle soup
1 can tomato soup
pepperoni (any left over meat will do)
oregano
mushrooms (canned are ok)
green pepper
pepper
Cook noodles in tomato soup adding water called for by both soup mixes, add all other ingredients (lots of pepper and oregano), serve when hot.This recipe can be made with as many variations as there are kinds of pizza. Enjoy (created one night when I came too early and partied too late).
From the kitchen of
Craig the Martian
Banana and Strawberry Puddin' Cake
1 box white cake mix.
1 big box Jello instant banana puddin'.
1 box of strawberry Jello.
Whipped Cream.
Make the white cake mix as instructed on the box.
Let the cake cool a lil' bit then poke holes all throughout the cake with anything pointy you have layin' round'. Spraying it with pam helps it not stick to the cake.
Make the Jello as instructed but instead of cooling pour it all over the cake slowly letting it seep into the holes.
Let cake cool completely in the fridge..be patient its worth it!
Meanwhile make Banana Puddin' as it says on the box.
When your cake is nice and cold take it out and top it with the puddin' then with the whipped cream.
Other optional toppings: Granola,fresh banana,Strawberries or other fruits. Basically whatever you like.
MINCEMEAT DISH
Ingredients:
1 lb Hamburger
1 roll "Hot" Breakfast Sausage
1 jar Mincemeat
1 Ground Ginger
Brown hamburger in skillet. Pour off any fat. Put in bowl. Take breakfast sausage out of
plastic sleeve and brown. Pour off any fat. Add to bowl with hamburger. Sprinkle ginger on
meat. Stir together. Add the jar of mincemeat and mix all together well. Sprinkle with ginger
to taste. Serve warm as a side dish.
Taco To-Go, aka "walking taco"
Ingredients:
1 small bag of your favorite flavor of Doritos
1/2 cup shredded cheese
1/2 cup shredded lettuce
1 tablespoon of sourcream
1 tablespoon of salsa
Without opening the bag, lightly crush the Doritos. Cut a slit longways down the seam of the bag, so that you open it into a "pouch." Add all of the ingredients and stir. All ingredients are optional and you can add any other toppings that you'd like. This is a great snack to send your kids to school with.
From
Aami in Savannah, GA
South Mississippi White Trash Drankin' Food stuff
1 lb. pkg Weiners, sliced to 1/4" thickness
1 TBSP Bacon Grease
1 can Pork and Beans
1 can Corn
1/2 slab Velveeta cut into 1/2" cubes
1/2 cup diced onion
2 TBSP Mayonaise
Hamburger or hotdog buns
Fry sliced weiners in bacon grease until slightly browned.
Add can of Pork & Beans; add can of Corn. Stir until well-mixed.
Simmer 10 minutes.
Add Velveeta.
Simmer until Velveeta is melted.
Stir in onion and mayonnaise, mix well.
Serve on buns, biscuits, cornbread, saltines or just in a dang bowl.
Ummm good and always better after midnight.
From Ferg
Tea's Cornbeef Salad Sandwiches
Ingredients:
1 can Libby's Cornbeef
mayo
relish (sweet or pickled)
celery
Open up your can of corn beef and plop it in a microwave safe dish. Nuke it for about 2 minutes.
When it done add at least 2 huge spoonfuls of your favorite mayo. I like the Blue Plate.
Stir all that together until it is all mixed in then add 1-2 tablespoons of relish and 1 stick of celery diced.
You can add pepper, garlic, or paprika ifen you want but you don't need to add salt cause the corn beef is plenty salty.
Mix that all up then smear on your fave bread. Usually makes 3 sandwiches worth.
Goes great with beer or your fave soda.
From
the kitchen of Tea Wolfwind.
Bologna
Cups
This hearty meal goes well with
sports.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Line a muffin
tin with bologna slices (red ring removed).
Crack an egg into the center of each bologna cup.
Sprinkle each with salt and black pepper.
Bake until firm.
Add a slice
of American cheese to each cup and bake until melted
or you can broil cheese.
Serve
with beer and tobasco.
From
the kitchen of Semi-Vicious.
Buttermilk
Biscuits
These biscuits are light and tangy. Try using them
to top a fruit cobbler. Just add 1/2 cup sugar to
mixture. Place biscuits on cobbler when the fruit
starts to boil or the last 15 minutes of baking.
Sprinkle with cinnamon and sugar.
Preheat oven to 500 degrees
Sift together
2 cups all-purpose flour (Lily White brand if you
can get it)
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
Take a cold stick of real butter and chip it up
with a paring knife into your flour mixture. Take
your fingers and blend the butter into the dry ingredients
breaking the butter up as you mix. You want the
mixture to be crumbly. These biscuits need to go
into the oven chilled. Place back into the fridge
for about 10 minutes or the freezer if you need
it quicker.
Stir
in 1 cup buttermilk only until wet. You don’t
want to overwork because your biscuits will be tough.
Flour your hands and hand-form biscuit quickly.
Mixture is sticky so you won’t get smooth
round biscuits. Just plop some down on the cookie
sheet and throw them in the oven. Put the remaining
mixture back in the fridge if you are doing two
batches. Cook for 8-10 minutes in 500-degree oven.
Recipe
from the kitchen of a little “biscuit eater”.
Fried
Catfish
Some people think catfish taste like dirt. That’s
a matter of opinion. But round here I’ve heard
it said, if you’re gonna eat fish, you gotta
taste a little bottom. The best catfish is caught
locally but don’t let that stop you from trying
the farm-raised kind because both are a cheap alternative
to pork.
Depending on how thick your catfish is, leave whole
or cut up into 2-inch pieces for catfish fillets.
Lay out catfish in shallow pan and cover with buttermilk.
Mix 1 cup yellow cornmeal
1/4 cup self-rising flour
1 teaspoon paprika
1 teaspoon garlic powder
Salt and pepper to taste
Sift dry ingredients together, lick finger and taste,
add salt.
Beat
an egg well in medium size bowl.
Preheat oven to 350 to keep catfish warm after frying.
Heat about 1/2 inch vegetable oil in heavy skillet
to medium high. With a fork take a piece of catfish
from your buttermilk and dip into egg followed by
the dry mix. Place in hot oil. Repeat and cook each
piece about 2 minutes a side. As you take them out
place onto a brown paper sack. When you are finished
frying, slide catfish from paper to a cookie sheet
and place in the warm oven. When you’re finished
fixing the rest of supper, pull catfish out and
plate it up. Feeds 3-4 people and goes well with
mustard greens, coleslaw, and tobasco sauce.
From
the kitchen of Pecan Tarwater.
Hoecakes
These thin, crispy, cornmeal
pancakes can be eaten with any meal. I grew up watching
my Great Aunt fry them up in a cast iron skillet.
My cousins roll up leftover bacon in hoecakes and
stuff them in their camo pockets to eat while they’re
out hunting. They won’t spoil like bologna
or mayonnaise.
To start you, need bacon drippings. If you’re
not saving your bacon grease, you should. Keep it
in the fridge and scoop out a spoonful as needed.
If you want to keep fairly large quantities available
for frying, cook down a couple of pounds of fatback
or bacon slowly on low heat. This will take a while
but it makes the house smell good. Pour your grease
through a metal strainer and store it in the fridge.
It will last two weeks. Leaving nothing to waste
- take the bits or cracklin', and stir them into
your corn bread batter. I prefer cracklin' in the
salty, firm kind of cornbread.
Mix 1 cup yellow cornmeal
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt and 1tsp black pepper
Combine with a whisk or shift together.
In a
separate bowl mix
1 cup buttermilk
1 cup milk
1 beaten egg
Whisk together wet and dry ingredients. Mixture
will be thin. Place about a tablespoon of bacon
drippings in the bottom of a heavy skillet and heat
to medium high. Using a gravy spoon or ladle, make
your hoecakes like you would regular pancakes. Watch
your heat and adjust to avoid burning. I like to
eat these cakes with molasses in the morning or
to sop up beans at dinnertime.
From
the kitchen of Miss Taylor in Georgia.
Rice
Pudding
Rice pudding can usually be made without going to
the store. Most people make this recipe from leftover
rice. When hard times hit, omit the raisins.
In a deep
pot on real low heat add
3 cups cooked white rice
4 cups whole milk
1/2 cup sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
Stir frequently for about 45 minutes until thick.
Preheat your
oven to 350 degrees
In separate
bowl whisk together
4 egg yolks
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 teaspoon cinnamon or nutmeg
Take rice mixture
off the heat and stir in eggs and flavorings along
with 1/2 cup raisins.
Pour
into a buttered 9 x 9-inch baking dish and place
in oven for about 35 minutes or until firm. Cool
and serve sprinkled lightly with more cinnamon.
From
the kitchen of Sawata Jones in North Carolina.
Tangwich
2 slices of Wonder Bread
Marshmallow Fluff as required
powdered Tang drink mix as required
Spread a thick layer of Marshmallow Fluff on a slice
of Wonder Bread. Sprinkle enough powdered Tang on
that slice so as to completely cover all evidence
of Fluff. Then spread a layer of Fluff on the other
slice of Wonderbread. Press the two slices of bread
together and voila: a delicious Tangwich! The perfect
accompaniment to this meal would be rehydrated Tang
but Sloe Gin & Coke will always do nicely as
well.
Sarah Nagel
WHITE
TRASH BREAKFAST
1/2 dozen thick-cut slices of baloney cut into pieces
1/2 dozen eggs, beaten
1/4 block of Velveeta, chunked up
Fry baloney to desired crispness. Toss beaten eggs
into frying pan and scramble along with baloney.
Toss in Velveeta at the very end to melt. Serve
with biscuits.
Sherrie Dudey
COLLARD GREENS
2 ham hocks
1 sweet onion
4-5 lbs. collard greens
2-3 cups of water(enough to barely cover greens)
Bring the ham hocks to a boil. Turn heat down and
simmer for about an hour. Destem greens and add
them to the pot. Let the greens simmer for a couple
of hours. Serve with vinegar and onions. Collards
are always best the second day.
Robert Lewis
HOT & SWEET
BBQ SAUCE
1 half bottle of Makers Mark BBQ Sauce
1 shot of Makers Mark
3 tablespoons of A-1 Steak Sauce
1 tablespoon of Tabasco Sauce
2 tablespoons of Franks Louisana Hot Sauce
1 teaspoon of mustard
3 tablespoons of honey
1 tablespoon of brown sugar
1 teaspoon of lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon of Liquid Smoke
Stir well and spread on baby back ribs.
Brent Thurman
HEARTPUMPER SHAKE
1 oz. ground coffee (not brewed)
2 cigarettes worth of tobacco (mediums)
1 can of Mountain Dew
Shake and drink. Do not regurgitate.
Unknown
CHIPMUNK FRICASSEE
2 pounds diced chipmunk (the legs are most of the
meat but the breast is good if you have the patience)
minced garlic
chopped onion
hot peppers
Guinness stout
butter
hot pepper flakes
chicken or possum stock
peeled and quartered potatoes
This actually tastes a lot like chicken (but still
with a difference). It's best made with Rocky Mountain
chippers(East Coast chippies are too small) and
perhaps served with a nice Sauvignon Blanc. Marinate
the chipmunk meat in the garlic, onion, hot peppers,
and Guinness. Saute in a skillet with butter, pepper
flakes, and salt. Cook quickly until browned. Deglaze
the skillet with the stock and put it all into a
large saucepan or stockpot along with the marinade
and the potatoes. Cover and bake at 275 degrees
for two hours. Remove from the oven and, in a separate
pan, reduce whatever marinade is left and whisk
in six ounces of additional butter. Combine reduced
marinade with chipmunk meat and serve.
Bill Teahan
BRISKET
SANDWICH (WHITE TRASH LUNCH)
-1/4 lb of chipped ham
-1 cup BBQ sauce
-1/4 cup of Pepsi
-4 slices of Wonder Bread
Fry up chipped ham in a skillet. After edges of
the ham start to get crispy, add the BBQ Sauce and
Pepsi. Mix until everything is heated up and steam
is rising. Place chipped ham between 2 slices of
Toasted Wonder Bread. This recipe is for 2. Recommended
side dish is Potato Chips.
David Blake
TERESA'S
REALLY GOOD GOAT'S MILK FUDGE
1 cup of Meyenberg Evaporated Goat Milk. (If you
use real goats milk, use 1/2 cup goat's milk with
1/2 cup whole milk)
2 cups sugar
1 tablespoon butter
1 cup peanut butter
Mix together the milk and sugar in a cooker. Butter
a plate or dish to place the finished product. Bring
to a boil. To check for doneness, place a saucer
of cold water nearby. Place a drop of the mixture
in the saucer of cold water. When done, the drop
will form a ball and you can pick up. Next, add
butter and peanut butter. Take off heat. Stir quickly
and carefully pour the mixture in the buttered dish.
Let stand to cool. * I have no recipe for chocolate
fudge. I made it once but it tasted AWFUL!!! Peanut
butter seems to be the way to go!
Teresa Prince
HOMEMADE
VENISON SAUSAGE
Venison
Smoked Bacon Ends
Garlic or Sage
Sausage Casings
Cube venison and smoked bacon ends in equal parts.
Smoked bacon ends may be found at just about any
butcher shop). Grind, alternating venison and bacon
ends. After grinding, spread out meat and add seasoning.
You may season with garlic, sage, or any sausage
seasoning you desire. Most butcher shops sell packages
of sausage seasonings. After seasoning, knead the
meat. Then, with stuffing attachment on grinder,
stuff into casing in desired lengths. You may also
make sausage patties. Wrap in butcher paper and
freeze until ready to smoke. When ready to smoke,
place sausage in smoker at 200F and smoke 2-3 hours
until done.
K.W. Baker
DUMP
CAKE
1 (20 oz.) can crushed pineapple
1 (30 oz.) can cherry pie filling
1 box cake mix (white, yellow, or spice work best)
1 cup chopped nuts
1 stick of butter
Open can of crushed pineapple and dump contents
(as is - do not drain out the juice!) into a greased
9x13 baking dish, spreading it evenly. Open can
of cherry pie filling and dump contents of that
on top of the crushed pineapple, also spreading
it evenly. Open box of cake mix, and spread it evenly
over the top of the other stuff, and put the nuts
on top of that. Cut up stick of butter and lay slices
evenly over the top. Bake at 350 for 1 hour.
Shari
ELVIS
PARTY MIX
1 pound banana chips
1 box capt crunch peanut butter crunch
1 large wooden tiki carved salad serving ware (preferably
wooden carved with tiki idols)
Pour 1 lb of banana chips into large serving bowl.
Add 1 box peanut butter crunch. Stir with large
salad serving fork and spoon. Serve (best eaten
by hand). Optional: Add one pound of dried pineapple
chips for a greater luau effect.
Raymondo in Greensboro
TUNA
SALAD (FOR MEN)
1 can of tuna (don't get the oil packed stuff, it's
greasy)
1 medium yellow onion
2 tsp. minced garlic
2 tbsp. mayo (or what passes for mayo these days)
4 tbsp. or more (as much as you can stand, actually)
Beaver, Cream Style, Horseradish
Get a fairly big bowl. Dice up the onion, add the
garlic and tuna, and mix with a fork. Add the mayo
and horseradish. Don't get cheap on the horseradish
either; more is ALWAYS better. Mix again and add
pepper if you like. Let stand for a half hour or
so (if you're patient) to let the flavors mix. This
type of tuna salad is not recommended for sandwiches.
It goes real good on most kinds of crackers, especially
Rye Crisps. For a treat, blanket a 10-inch flour
tortilla with a bed of baby spinach leaves and spread
tuna salad on top, roll it all up, and fire away!!
Suggested wine: Burgundy. Bone Appeteat!
Steve Monteleone
WHITE
TRASH CASSEROLE
1 pound hamburger, cooked up with 1 small onion
and salt
1 pound tater tots (still frozen)
1 can of cream of ___________ soup (mushroom, chicken,
asparagus, whatever,
condensed, undiluted)
2 1/2 cups shredded cheddar cheese (or Velveeta)
Mix it all up in a casserole dish, saving 1/2 cup
cheese/ Velveeta for the top. Bake at 350 for 20
minutes. YUUUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMYY!!!!
Mike & Jamie Keller
MUDBOG
1 Part cheap beer
1 Part chocolate milk
Fill your favorite frosty mug half full of your
favorite bargain brand brew. Top it off with the
chocolate milk. Savor the creamy head. Goes great
with Bacon Meatballs.
BACON
MEATBALLS
1 lb. ground beef
1 Tablespoon Salt
1 Teaspoon Pepper
2 Tablespoons steak sauce (or the closest thing
you can find)
5 Slices of bacon
Toss everything except the bacon
into a bowl. Mix it up real good. Shape this mixture
into small balls (1" or so wide). Wrap that
there bacon around the balls and fasten with a toothpick
or twig. Slow cook 'em in a skillet until good n'
done. Serve with crackers or white bread soaked
in ball juice from skillet.
POSSUM
AND CHESTNUTS
1 Possum
1 Pot boiling water
1 Handful chestnuts
1 Handful apple sauce
1 Handful breadcrumbs
1 sweet potato
1/2 Cup lemon juice
1/4 Cup butter
Skin Possum, remove glands and entrails.
Scrape clean and scald in boiling water. Rub inside
and out with salt and pepper and set in a cool place.
Stuff with chestnuts, applesauce, and bread crumbs
in equal proportions. Cover with slices of sweet
potato, 1 C. Boiling water, 1/2 C. Lemon Juice.
Bake in butter and baste often until tender.
this delicious recipe courtesy
of Patricia and Ruthie in Indiana
CHOCOLATE
PIG PICKING CAKE FROSTING
16 oz. Cool Whip
1 small box instant chocolate puddin'
1 15 1/2 oz. crushed pinapple
1/2 cup pecans, or what ever nut you like
Mix together and put frosting between layers.
1 box milk chocolate cake mix
4 eggs
2/3 cup oil
1 can mandarin oranges
Beat all ingredients together. Grease 3 cake pans
(9 inch); divide batter evenly. Bake at 350 degrees
for 35 minutes or until done.
this haute cuisine courtesy of
Kim Gregory-Lowe of Bunker Hill, West Virginia
DEEP
FRIED BALONEY SANDWICHES
2 thick slabs of baloney
2 pieces of Wonder Bread
2 Tbsp. (just a suggestion, use as much as you want)
mayonnaise/peanut butter
1 can mandarin oranges
Beat all ingredients together. Throw yer baloney
into the deep fryer. Cook until crispy, but not
too crispy. Coat your bread with mayonnaise or peanut
butter (if you use peanut butter, make sure you
got a big 'ol glass of milk. She can get purty dry).
Slap the baloney down on the bread and yer in for
some good eatin'!
FRIED
GRITS
6 servings of grits (prepared - NOT INSTANT)
1/2 pound of bacon
2 eggs
salt & pepper
Prepare grits the night before as per instructions
on package. Pour them into 9" square brownie
pan and place in fridge overnight. Consume alcohol.
The next morning, fry 1/2 pound of bacon in iron
skillet and retain hot grease. Consumption of bacon
optional. Break eggs into mixing bowl and scramble
thoroughly, sprinkling generously with salt &
pepper. Remove grits from fridge (they should be
in solid form) and cut into approximately 3"
squares. Dip grits squares into scrambled eggs and
fry in bacon grease on medium heat until egg coating
is golden brown and crispy around edges. Serve with
sliced ripe tomatoes smeared with Miracle Whip and
your favorite breakfast beverage.Put on "Plastic
Seat Sweat" and turn up real loud.
WHITE TRASH DELIGHT
1
( 7 oz. ) can of spam
2 hard-boiled eggs
1 teaspoon chopped dry onion
2 tablespoons dill relish
1/4 cup miracle whip or mayo
1/2 cup velveeta cheese, cubed
4 hamburger or hot dog buns
dump spam and hard-boiled eggs into a bowl. Mash
'em with a fork. Then dump in the onion,relish,mayo
and cheese. Stir it up and fill the buns with the
mix. Wrap 'em up in aluminum foil and put 'em on
a baking sheet. Bake at 350 degrees for about 20
minutes - 'til the cheese is melted. Makes 4 servings
- unless one feller is a pig and eats 'em all.
from the kitchen of T.L. Norris
in Independence, MO.
XMAS GINGERBREAD
TRAILER
box of graham crackers
canned vanilla frostin'
sugar cubes (blocks if you kin find 'em)
sugar
fancy colored candy
busted hot wheels car
toothpick flag
Cracker Outhouse (optional)
Break a graham cracker in two to use fer the trailer
ends. Spread a bunch of frosting out on a plate
or other flat non-livin' surface and sprinkle with
sugar. Stick 4 sugar blocks in the frosting where
the graham crackers can stand on 'em. Frost them
tops of the cubes. Frost them cracker edges and
stick lengthwise on top of the frosted sugar cubes,
joinin' em glue-like at the frosted edges. Let it
set a bit till hard. Frost the top of a 'nother
graham cracker like it was snowed on and glue it
down to the top of the cracker trailer with more
frostin'. sprinkle the whole dang thing with sugar
while still gooey. Stick fancy candies around the
yard and on the house. Stick the flag in the yard.
Put yer hot wheels car in the yard or on a sugar
block. Cracker Outhouse Couple of saltines, broke
in half more frostin' Put together with frostin'
glued edges like trailer, but make it taller than
it is wide. Top with cracker bit.
A family Xmas tradition of Cotton
and Crackers Lambeth and their kin in Virginia
BAKED
SKUNK
1 Skunk
Potatoes
Carrots
Onions
Spices like you like (onion powder, garlic powder-if
you paid rent and had leftover monies)
1 Cutting Board
Gut and skin the skunk.Stuff it with the vegetables
and spices. Bake at about 250 -300 degrees a real
long time, slow cookin' no? Until the skunk is real
tender. When the skunk is cooked to your likin',
take it out of the oven to set for about 15 minutes.
Then, put the baked vegetables on a serving platter
and Throw the Skunk Out!
from the kitchen of Heidi Lucken
FRIED
CORNBREAD
A good heapin' of Tenda Bake Self-Rising Corn Meal
Mix
1 fist size onion
Enough Buttermilk to get everything good an' juicy
Goodly size gob of grease or vegetable oil
Dump a good heapin' of cornmeal mix in a fairly
decent-sized bowl. Grate onion into cornmeal mix.
Set aside. Now, throw a pretty fair amount of shortening
or oil into a big black iron frying pan. Heat until
it's good and hot.(You will have to add more grease/oil
as it usually soaks up alot of grease/oil when you
are cooking several pans.) While your grease/oil
is heating up, add enough buttermilk to cornmeal
and oil mixture to make it soupy but not too runny.
Simply spoon this mixture into the hot pan, turn
after browning on first side and brown the second
side. Let drain and serve either hot or cold. Goes
great with collards, turnip greens and pinto beans.
from the kitchen of Lee Justice
TERESA'S
REALLY GOOD PUMPKIN PIE
1 30 oz. can of Libby's Pumpkin Pie Mix
2 9 inch Deep Dish frozen pie shells
1 1/2 c. sugar
1 teasp. salt
1 teasp. cinnamon
1/2 teasp. ginger
1/2 teasp. cloves
2 cans of Evaporated Milk
1 tablespoon of Pumpkin Pie Spice
2 eggs
Mix together all of the ingredients.
Take the pie shells out of the freezer. Do not let
them thaw. Pour mixture into the pie shells. ( There
will be some mixture left over.) Place pies on a
cookie sheet and bake till done.* * I have no idea
what temperature to bake them on because my stove
doesn't have the temperatures on it. I bake cakes
at this same setting so go by whatever temperature
you bake cakes. Pies are done when you place a fork
or toothpick in the center of the pie and it comes
out clean.
from the kitchen of Teresa
